A Burden

Jesus is beautiful. I do not deserve entrance into His throne room. He gives life and He is light. He is shedding light upon some things to my heart... 

I have been really convicted over something lately, very burdened actually.  I read the Bible and see these men and women led by God and communing with the living God.  I see how God fills them with His Spirit and has this amazing relationship with them.  I then read George Whitefields Journals and other saints accounts that have lived a few hundred years ago, I see their relationship with the Living God.  They searched, they afflicted themselves, they sought the Lord for months, even years sometimes, STILL NOT KNOWING THE LORD, when finally THE LORD revealed HIMSELF to them and delivered them in a very real way.  Salvation belongs to the LORD.  They then had a very beautiful life with Christ, He is real, He is near, He dwells within them in power. 

 You don't see salvation like this anymore, this seeking God for salvation that is.  Or even questioning and examining your own salvation, working out your own salvation with fear and trembling.  Now we read a devotional book in the morning, are inspired by a book or learn something from the bible and call this "communing with God".  Now we say a prayer and we declare someone saved.  Now a preacher says, say this prayer and by doing that you are being saved, then we assure them they are saved and if they question their salvation we say it is the enemy.  Is this the salvation of the Bible?  Should men or God confirm our salvation to us?  Shouldn't His Word be the One to confirm or condemn us?  Is it possible to receive false peace instead of alone with the Lord receiving a peace that surpasses all understanding?  I am not opposed to a prayer, I think it can happen like this, the Lord could quicken even a word to someone and they could be saved right then and there the Holy Spirit could come into that person and dwell with them.  But I see a lot of intellectual assent and much gaining of knowledge without actually KNOWING the Lord, without a heart change, without the Lord saving, coming to save, without true fruit.  Even times there is a heart change, maybe the person's whole life changed after that from outward appearance, they could have been sensitive to their conscience for the first time in their life.  And from being so their works change, they no longer live in obvious sin, but become religious instead.  Maybe they become a "good person" and become very well liked.  But religion and cognitive assent of the bible cannot save anyone no matter how sincere they are in this.      

Is God not the same God yesterday, today and forever?  Isn't He the same God the same Spirit then and today?  Why then did salvation of the Bible and from years ago look so contrary to what we call salvation today?  Do you actually see people being born again now?  I believe we do see this, but we also see a lot of false conversions.

Does being a disciple of Jesus Christ have a cost now like it did before?  Do we count the cost?  Do we please God or men?  Do we know what it is to be filled with the Holy Ghost or do we know what it is to be filled with a feeling?  The Holy Spirit is a Person, being filled with Hiim is actually having Christ indwelling a person.  Do we hate our life?  Do we want to serve Him and glorify Him or ourselves?  Do we have a burden for the lost?  Do we weep over the lost?  

Be honest before the Lord God, seek Him in truth.

2 Corinthians 13:5 "Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates?" 

1 John 1:4-10 "And these things write we unto you, that your joy may be full. This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:  But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.  If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us." 

Psalm 26:2 "Examine me, O LORD, and prove me; try my reins and my heart."